odditycollector

[transcript: xkcd comic recast with Homestuck peeps because apparently it’s not ever going to stop being funny to me.
PANEL 1: John Egbert, floating upside down in a blue panel, aiming a flashlight at the floor.
JOHN: Eight meters. There’s the wreckage… Yes! I see the key!
PANEL 2:
JOHN: Gotta grab it, surface, get in to the radio shed, and warn the President! Just a few more…
FLASHLIGHT: *fitzes*
PANEL 3: John is shaking the flashlight, which is no longer functioning.
JOHN: Oh no.
PANEL 4: All that preceding is revealed as John’s mental speculation as he considers two brands of flashlight offered for sale. One is $24.95 and claims water resistance to 10 meters; the other is $49.99 and might be submerged up to 40 meters.
PANEL 5: John continues to ponder, and beside him Karkat gestures with widening arms.
JOHN: …Maybe I should spring for the deeper water resistance.
KARKAT: Why the fuck would you care about that?
JOHN: Look, you never know.]

Original Strip.

As an x-ray into John Egbert’s brain, I feel this ranks as pretty accurate.

(And yet the most unlikely part of his scenario is how he’s diving with his glasses on.)

tigerhazard:

demagogol:

odditycollector:

dziwaczka:

YOUR TASTE IN WOMEN IS GOING TO GET YOU KILLED

I can’t add anything here.

LOOK I KNOW IT’S BAD FORM TO CRITICIZE THE EXBUT IT’S BAD FORM FOR THE EX TO BE A MASS MURDERER WHO YOU ONLY DATED BECAUSE YOU WANTED IN HER PAIL Karkat That Doesnt Make Sense My Own Independent Actions And Desires Cant Have Constituted Rudeness On Her Part THAT’S WHAT YOU THINK. THAT’S……… WHAT YOU THINK. Karkat Adding Significant Ellipses Is Not An Argument Whatever Terezi May Have Told You WHO TOLD YOU I WAS TALKING TO TEREZI??? You Did Five Minutes Ago And Then Burst Into Tears Because You Said Her Voice Was Like The Voice Of Mourning Dragondoves OH GODIT’S SO TRUE THE MOST DULCET TONES KNOWN TO MAN OR REPTILE IF ONLY SHE WOULD CACKLE AGAIN IN MY EARSHOT— Karkat YES KANAYA Karkat I Never Thought Id Say This But Can We Go Back To My Taste In Women

sw oo n s … 

re-rebloging for improved commentary

yaye

[image: Rose, Kanaya, and Karkat in a cuddle pile. Kanaya has her eyes closed as she rests her head on Rose’s. Rose stares around Kanaya’s shoulder at Karkat, who glances away, bashful or embarrassed.]

whereismana:

i wonder if her light would be warm or not…..

dziwaczka:

YOUR TASTE IN WOMEN IS GOING TO GET YOU KILLED

I can’t add anything here.

crandoii:

This was supposed to be for Valentines to sempai but no, of course I have to be late for everything. I forgot to resize it before I coloured it, too. :c

Half a novelty margarita into the evening and, right on schedule, Karkat suddenly realizes that life is yawning existential chasm: much too serious a crisis to be overcome by humourous photography.

(Half a novelty margarita later, and Karkat is giggling unsubtly at the romantic ineptitude of the trio at a corner table, while John is “furious” about ridiculous petty shit like how the pub gave Karkat the drink with a bigger sugar brined cherry (which John doesn’t even like) and is on a rant about it.)

[image: John gleefully flicking handfuls of snow down on Karkat’s head. Karkat stares off frame with the haggard and faintly puzzled expression of a man who does not entirely understand why this is his fate in life, but has grown resigned to it anyway.]

queenoftheantz:

Haha Karkat it’s snowing!

Perfect rendition of John Egbert’s sense of humour in this space.

(via whatnobrono)

Wow, that sure is a bunch of people who care about the hypothetical universe with the hilariously incompetent Rose/Karkat/Kanaya pale triangle.

(Congrats on your excellent taste.)

So here’s a screen grab of the original context, which unfortunately can’t be reblogged directly. Author is gogol.

[image: Karkat angrily inserting himself in the way between Rose and Kanaya, presumably to prevent them from kissing.]

ruf1ohn1tram:

what an asSHOLE

rebloggable version uvu

(with apologies to the artist)

Help gogols I am reading this scene in the hypothetical universe where Karkat<>Rose is a thing and Karkat is convinced that Kanaya’s obvious jealousy is b/c she too is pale for Rose.

And eventually Karkat is so utterly consumed with guilt about Kanaya being flushzoned for his sake that this happens, and then he goes off on a rant about how he can’t take watching their charade of a matespritship any longer, and that they need to talk about what they really feel for each other, and don’t worry about him, pretend he’s not even a fucking factor…

When he runs out of breath, Rose - who has no idea what he’s babbling about - calmly excuses Kanaya and asks him if he wants to lie down and talk about his feelings. And Karkat is extremely torn, because yes, he really really wants to curl up in Rose’s shitty wizard statue pile until he stops feeling like his thorax is going to explode, but that is how they got into this mess.

And meanwhile Kanaya has stood up and is awkwardly brushing her skirt clean over and over and over. She has gotten the impression that Karkat is trying to auspistize between her and Rose’s stable red relationship, so she is saying passive aggressively snippy things about Karkat’s competence at the conciliatory quadrants. (What she means in her head is that he would be better off curling up in Kanaya’s shitty fabric swatch pile, but what Karkat assumes she means is that he is not good enough for Rose and remains the main obstacle of their true pale love .)

(…So at what point does Rose begin to wonder if they’re waxing black for each other - navigating an alien romantic system is so fascinating! - introducing the new question?)